Keeping It Real!

Sorry I haven't blogged in a while, and I would love to tell you some joyous humorous stories, but I like to keep it real, and this week had truly taxed me. I believe I can pull a few humorous clips out for my readers though, and I will do my best.


First, the Minnesota Corrections Association Conference in Duluth Started off my supposed fun week of getting out of the office. So I arrived on Tuesday night, and give the clerk my name at the Hawthorne Suites. The clerk quickly replied (after I gave him my name three times) that I was not in the system. Okay, no problem, so I gave him the training director's name (who last I knew was suppose to be sharing a suite with me and two other ladies). So the clerk found her name and tried calling up to her room to no avail. So, he gave me a key, and I headed up to find a one bedroom suite.... ahhhhh...... wait a minute. So I thought about this for a second............. where would by co-workers be??? Hmmmm.... ahhh yes the clerk had mentioned happy hour in the hotel lounge. Alas, I was right, and I found all of the 40 to 50 year old co-workers drinking up the free beer. So I patiently grabbed a Diet Coke, and waited to explain my room dilemma. Luckily, the lady stated that she had forgotten to tell me of a change in room plans and that I was in the wrong room.............. her and her husbands room!!!!! So, we talk to the clerk, straighten things out, and I get to my suite that I get to share with one other person. The suite was huge, with two bedrooms, three beds, two bathrooms, a jacuzze, a living room, and a kitchen, This "room" was better then my apartment, 10 fold. So....... I plopped my stuff down and my co-workers asked me to join them at Old Chicago, no big deal.... Luckily, I am with the older crowd, right? How bad can it be? So we go to Old Chicago, and more beers are order by my co-workers from Sam our cute twenty some year old waiter. So, I ordered my meal, and as I was eating my meal, my co-workers flirted, hooted, and hollered at Sam the whole time (who the older co-workers pointed out was cute and may be single, after I had rejected their ideas of me dating various guys from work and my companions sons that were about my age....). As if this wasn't bad enough, Sam asked if he could do anything else for us, and one of my co-workers starts clearing off the table, and asks Sam if he could strip for us! HELP ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Sam politely stated that he didn't do that, but their was a strip club across the way, and he quickly made his exit with a mischievous smile. So after this escapade with my "safe" co-workers, I made a quick exit myself, and headed to my hotel room to read and go to sleep at 10 at night. Now, I thought that perhaps I was safe in my suite, but it was not so....... Yikes!!! So, I was peacefully sleeping when I heard, "WHAT!!! She's sleeping!!!!!! You have got to be kidding!" Yes ladies, I was sleeping!!!!! So I ignored the noises coming from outside my room, and went back to sleep, only to have this scenario repeated several times. The next couple days where spent with my co-workers trying to tempt me to go out to the bars with them..... I hung out with my buddy Tom and saw North Country instead....... thank you very much, even though I had to catch a lot of grief for it because I didn't go out with them, and had once again went to sleep at 10 o'clock at night.


Thursday night at the Nursing Home. Next, I received a call from my Mom that my Grandpa was going to die soon, so I stressfully made some really quick decisions (calling my boss, getting some one my keys to take care of my cats, notifying people I was leaving, checking out), and headed to my parents. I then visited my Grandpa and some other lady that kept asking my Grandma if I was her SON!!!!!! Talk about getting a complex about your looks. She said many other things that made no sense before the other elderly gentle men in the room kicked her wheel chair, grabbed hold, and gave it a shove sending her sailing out of the room. He then informed us that you had to be a little tough in that place and just kick people out some times. At this point, I was more stressed watching my Grandpa suffer, and having some lady call me son over and over again. So, I told my Grandpa I loved him, and left, driving around until I found some friends. I was stressed beyond belief from being with my co-workers, feeling guilty about leaving work, and with my Grandpa's condition. After hanging out with my friends, I finally fell asleep at 3:50 in the morning after staring at the walls for hours, only to be woken up at 4 am and told my Grandpa passed away. Luckily, I fell back asleep after this.

Friday Morning, my Mom woke me up at 7:30 am...., and asked that I get outside right away. So I got up with my PJs on, pulled jeans over the top, out on a sweat shirt, two more jackets, gloves, and I walked out the door in about three minutes time, to see my Mom's yearling filly bleeding from both knees badly cut right above the knee. So, the vet was called out immediately, and by about 12:30 p.m. I was hungry and the horse was all stitched up. At this point, my Dad is gone at the funeral home (I was going to go with him but decided to stay with my distraunt Mom), and my Mom is frantically worrying and running around.

I am stressed!!!!! Luckily I have a few days off, two for funeral leave and 4 days after that. *sighs* It can only go up hill from here, right?

Dress Codes

Dress Codes can be a good thing, and they can be a bad thing. Obviously, my job follows a dress code. I personally like the dress code because I don't have to decide what to wear to work. Every day, it is the same outfit, and best of all, the state pays for it!!!! Of course, with a dress code I have to change every day before I go to work, or wear my outfit every where I go, and get called a wanna be cop. Wanna be... blah, my gold colored plate, name tag thingy on my coat says Ofc. _______, and I'm real edjumicated too...... Any how, I ran into a problem with the dress code at work. The dress code requires a person to iron their cloths before work every day. Hmmmmm.... wouldn't the state be interested to know that I don't own an iron, and I have never owned an iron since I started working for them over a year ago! *smirks* Now, so far this hasn't been a problem, but I want to transfer to Thistle Dew where I would be living in a dorm style living arrangement with other Corrections Officers. In this setting I suppose I would have to buy an iron, as my fellow officers would probably notice that I never ironed before work or that they had never seen an iron in my possession. So I got to thinking about this, how to acquire an iron........ hmmmmm....... I got it, I will have a room warming party when I move up there, and ask specifically for an iron. Of course, then I would have to learn how to use it!

Two A-Team Responses!

So, I had a fun day at work the other day, where I had to call two emergency (A-team) responses to my cottage, errrrr..... I mean...... I called one, with the other I.... lets say.... ummm... had my hands full, so my partner called for the A-team response.
My day started off in the downward spiral. At the beginning of my shift I asked that everyone go outside since it was a nice day, and as the facility had no power that day our gym time was cancelled for the afternoon. The residents swore, gripped, and complained the whole time, continuing to state that it was unfair. I responded to this politely, and took in their concerns in, stating too bad!!!!!! Next, our resident paranoid schizophrenic took it upon himself to steal the remote when no one was looking, and watch BET (not allowed) trying to fool my partner who usually doesn't work in my cottage and doesn't know the rules. She confronted him on this and he became angry with her, beginning to target her. Next, it was discovered that two residents were in the same bathroom stall (doing each others hair), which is a huge no no. So, we called patrol, and when the paranoid schizophrenic came out of the stall (he was in there with a sex offender kid, luckily a straight one), my partner asked the paranoid schizophrenic why he was in the stall with another resident. The paranoid schizophrenic then became angry and paranoia set in, so I intervened explaining why the ruls were in place. The paranoid schizophrenic then went off stating that my partner was accusing him of having sex in the stall with the other residents. He said this loudly refusing cues and suggestions to take a break in his room. He also stated that my partner needed to leave the building, as we know what happened last time (he assualted a female officer), that he doesn't get along with female staff, and that he could not control himself when he became defensive and didn't know what he would do. Eventually, the Lt. came down and spoke with the resident, and he calmed down and apologized profusely to me and patrol, though pointedly ignoring my partner. Next, the unit went to the weight room to lift weights. On the way, a different resident was talking loudly about another resident as our cottage passed in hearing distance of the resident he was trashing. The resident was told by another resident to watch his comments, as this could start a fight. The resident ignored this, and the guy that confronted it notified staff. The resident then started calling him a snitch, and went off to lift weights. After some weight lifting, the resident all of a sudden went off, swearing and talking about niggers and snitches. He was given several cues by staff and residents to take a break and use his interventions, but he continued to verbal abuse others. I then contacted the Lt. and he gave permission to lock the kid up in the security unit. The kid that started swearing stating "I ain't going no where because of some snitches and &*^%$es." We spoke with the residnet for several minutes trying to get him to turn around and cuff up. The resident then stated "Fine, but I ain't going to make this easy," and he laid down on the floor with his arms clasped underneath him. We then used as little force as necessary to restrain the kid and attempt to get his arms out. We pulled him on his side and he started to resist, kicking my partner who called for an A-team. The kid was restrained before they arrived on scene. Next, we returned to the cottage and it was reported that the resident had arrive at the security unit and smashed his head into the door (when in the room by himself) spreading blood all over the glass and possibly breaking his nose.... smart kids!!!! It was also discovered that another resident was trash talking and that had set the resident at the security unit off in the first place. The resident was pulled aside, and I attempted to talk to him about the incident, but he lied and went around in circles until asked to go down to his room. The resident escalated and argued stated he was not going down to his &*^% room. He then walked away swearing and telling everyone to get away from him, repeating that he was not going to the security unit. He then clenched and unclenched his fists, walking towards the desk. I activated the A-team and as they arrived the kid suddenly unclenched his fists, leaned against the dek and put his arms quickly behind his back.... hmmmmmmmm..... A-team number two.

So....... anyone want my job????

Divorce proceedings

So, I had my Mom question Adam's Mom about his lack of calling so that I would have a substantial case for a divorce, and it was found out that Adam had called me and left a message, and I never responded, so he thought I was busy and didn't want to bother me??!?!?! Hmmmm.... he must have been thinking of his other wives, because I never got a message from him! Hrrrummmppppp.... Any ways, he called and we scheduled a reconciliation party at the Sheep Ranch... how romantic, a repeat of our first date. If he thinks I am going to take him back now, he has another thing coming!!!!!! I will still take the free trip to Sheep Ranch though!!!!! IIt still can't be considered using him, as he knows nothing about our dates, marriage, or divorce, :))

Divorce before marriage

Alright, that is it!!!! A women's wrath!!!! Adam has not called, and it has been a week a a half! He is in for it now!!! I want a divorce even before the marriage............. and I am going to tell his Mother about this!!!!!!!!!! Not about the divorce....... but about the not calling part! Men!!!!!!


Yikes, *stops and thinks for a minute*. I hope those who read my blog truly know that while most things I write are factual, I tend to hint towards the humorous end of things. The whole marriage to Adam deal came up because of what I had told his Mom before meeting him, and went into an interesting story that could sound rather bizarre to those who do not know or understand me. True I like and admire him, true I did hang out with him quite a few times, but unture that they were dates, and untrue that I had plans of making him a future husband. In reality I simply enjoy having a new friend to hang out with. One should not stress about relationships or worry no matter how old you get. For one, anxiety, worry, pushing for a relationship, and fretting gets you no where but being an anxious wreck. Then you ruin the fun you could be having each day. Instead, enjoy each day, and have fun thinking about the next adventure in life. Relationships is a universal topic, and it is always great for story telling, but relationships should truly be taken in stride with great patience, no worries! Oh, and about kidding around about divorce, I don't believe in divorce. Well, there is the FYI for you.

Learning words in a correctional facility....

The last few days have encompassed nothing, but working with entertaining youth. Although I am sure the youth are not at all entertained in their anger and delinquency, but I am quite amused by their langauge and shenanigins (how do you spell that?). For instance, the other day one African American called two other African American's "Thoroughbred ass niggers." How perplexing, first I thought about locking up the kid who had numerous problems that day, and second I wondered who the kid was truly insulting. Thoroughbreds are suppose to be the top horses, and as far as slang goes he is insulting his own race, so while they are thoroughbred ass niggers, that would leave him as a simple nigger, in his words......?!?!??! Hmmmmm..... awe well. Needless to say, I asked that he not use the word nigger, as I detest that word no matter who is using it, and second he had to deal with lots of blabbing in his ear about his words and actions that day.

This leads to another question.... who is being racist, the Mexican, White, or Black? Myself, a Mexican resident, and the same Black resident were discussing racism. The Black resident (also a paranoid schizophrenic) stated that Whites were holding power and it had not change since slave days, it was just that Whites were losing power and it was to their advantage to change the ways to maintain control (A conspiracy!!! in his words). Also judges were racist, the nations leaders were racist, and we just put Blacks in prison for no reason. OKAY then! The Mexican then stated that all people are selfish and any majority tries to use any common trait to loop together and prey upon the minority gaining an advantage because all people are inherently selfish. Okay............ hmmmm....... Both the Black and the Mexican then said when the population shifted and Blacks and Hispanics were the majority, the Whites were in for it because of their mistreatment of them. I went on to ask if this was addressing racism in any way shape or form, or possibly promoting it further through the lines of the conversation. The answer was a simple, White's deserve it and it is the natural course of things amongst people's selfish reasoning. Yikes!!!!!! I really hope not everyone sees it that way! I explained that the way they were speaking against racism was actually promoting it, and that there were better ways to address the issue by speaking out, etc. The Black stated that this would not work, as Abraham Lincoln was assisinated, along with Melcom X, and Martin Luther King.... hmmmm....?!!? They both stated there disagreements with my appropriate suggestions to deal with racism stating it would always be a factor in life, and sticking to their theories. I then explained that their thoeries promoted racism, and if they persisted I would lock them up, hence forth the conversation ended.

Whats the most reliable species? Male or Female? 2nd question, do I smell bad?

So I came up on Friday night and hung out with a few friends (as posted), with plans to have a great six day vacation. On Friday night, Amanda calls stating that she is up from Duluth. I request that she hangs out with me and she states, no problem, I will call you on Sunday. On Sunday.... no call. So, on Sunday I call Adam and thank him for the fight, stating get back to me whenever you can..... no return call. On Monday, my buddy CJ calls and states he is busy, but would like to see me. CJ then never calls back. On Tuesday I call the Newsy News sisters, and they state we can hang out on Wednesday. Now, they did call on Wednesday, and we did hang out, but they stated they would call me back after eating lunch, and they never did. On Tuesday Tom also called stated he was up from Duluth, and I asked that he call me back when he was done car shopping. He did, at 7:30 p.m. and I was too tired so I told him to call Wednesday afternoon, he didn't return my call, even after I tried to call him to tell him I was free. On Wednesday I also missed a call from my friend Chucky, and I asked that he call me back.... he never returned my call. On Wednesday I also called Traci, and she returned my call six hours later....... but at least she returned my call!!!!!

Lets calculate: Women: 2 call not returned, 2 calls returned. Men: 4 call not returned, 1 calls returned. Hmmmmm..... Moral of the story....... men are worst then women at returning calls, and I am in low self-esteem mode for the next week to come.........

Kick Boxing Adventures!

So, I got the chance to go with my family to the Hinckly Casino to watch Lori's son's kick boxing matches. Adam had originally had his fight cancelled, but last minute another guy's partner cancelled out, and he still wished to fight before his family, so Adam's trainer Frank (the manager of Sheep Ranch) set up an exhibition fight (where they are not fighting, just showing technique). So for Adam's exhibition fight, I got to see him with his shirt off!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Oh..... ummmm.... I mean, I got to see Adam's technique which was great, he is good. It is odd to see guys deck each other, and kick each other and then smile at one another while fighting. Usually they don't smile, but since it was a exhibition, they could relax some. Adam, of course, would have kicked this guy to no wheresville had it been a real fight. The referee had to seperate the two, and tell Adam to let the other guy finish the fight. I guess his mock hits were getting a little too hard. The best part about the whole fight was watching Frank's girl fighter Deedee. What a little tiger, my word. I don't think I would mess with the 4 foot tiger. She knocked down a tree and won! Jaime, Adam's brother fought too, and he lost his first fight :(..... He did an awesome job, and gave it his all. When he accidently fell on his opponent, he even helped the guy up. Wow, after some guy almost breaks my nose and kicks me to no end, I don't know if I could do that!!!!!! I might offer my hand, and then let go while he is half-way picked up off the ring floor :). Over all it was great. Here I thought it would be hard to watch friends get punched and kicked, but instead I wanted to yell, knock um out, lay them down, punch their lights out, but I refrained and politely behaved myself.

So the moral of the story: I got to see Adam with his shirt off!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

A woman's way of paying back a man!

So, I recently went to visit my parents to spend some quality time bonding. I arrived at 8:30 pm, and promptly left to hang out with my friends Kristen and Traci at 9:00 pm. So, after my long drive and lack of eating throughout the day, I was frightfully hungry, so me and the girls went out for some soda pop (I know makes complete sense doesn't it?). Any how, I ran into an old friend of my brother's, and he offered to buy me a soda pop. Hmmmmmm..... he also had sparks to his eyes and wanted my phone number. Well, I gave him my number, and he asked that I call him next time I come up, and he gave me his phone number (which I had deleted off my phone list a long time ago). Hmmmmmmm............. Well, what do you say to that? My Mom practically adopted the boy a long time ago... then he disappeared for the longest time, and my brother is good friends with him. I use to be the annoying little sister that tagged along annoying my brother, and his friend Scott (the guy). Scott use to pick on me mercilessly to get me to leave them alone. Funny, as I got older something changed, and he asked me out for coffee once a while back, but I had told him I would have to ask my brother first to get his take on him taking me out (even for coffee). Well, my brother gave his permission, but I never saw Scott after that, as our paths never crossed, and being the woman....... I don't call boys, they call me. The guy is an awesome fellow, truly. But, alas, I am not interested (plus I was fearful of my future husband finding out). I did accept the drink, and I would love to get together with him for a friendly chat (brother/sister type), but..... I don't want to falsely encourage the guy because I am pretty sure he likes me?

I asked my friends about accepting a soda pop from a guy, and they said to pay his kindness back all a girl had to do was hang out with the guy, so that they did not have to sit all alone and look like a loser? So, I invited him to temporarily join the group of girls. So that was easy, free pop, and all I have to do is sit there!!!!! He even offered to by my friends pop!

One last item to discuss on this blog..... What is going on with men lately?...... I have strangers off the street hitting on me lately. Craziness!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am not use to this. It is just odd! Perhaps it is the Iron Range, is there something in the water? Hmmmmm.... I took a bath this week, maybe that helped? I am not sure I like all the attention, yikes! No more baths for me!